Old Curiosity
The Three-Step Strategy For Winning Her Back
Who knows what happens? One minute things are going great, then the next she says those fateful words “We need to talk . . .” and she’s out of your life. There are three steps you can take to win her back if you really want her. This is a plan that targets a woman where she’s most vulnerable – her curiosity – and can incite jealousy as well! You will be on her mind even if she was sincere about the breakup, and she won’t rest until she’s satisfied the curiosity you’ve triggered.
The first step is easy: vanish into thin air. This means totally – if possible, get out of town for a while. Neither she nor her friends can see or hear from you. Women who break up with men are used to having them keep trying to make up – sometimes it takes weeks or months for a man to understand that it’s really over. Your job now is to break that mold. After a few days she’ll try calling you – “Just to see if you’re alright.” When she can’t get in touch with you, she’ll contact her friends – and then yours. It’s your job to prepare them, make sure they don’t give her any indication of what you’re up to or where you are. You’ve got some time on your hands now, but don’t waste it. You’ve got to make some changes in your own life: try getting a new wardrobe that gives you a new look, change your hairstyle, lose some weight if needed (but if weight loss is part of your approach, don’t change wardrobes until you’ve reached your goal!), join a gym and get into the habit of working out regularly . . . in short, perform a makeover on yourself, major or minor, it’s up to you. Of course, your phone numbers have to change as well – this approach just isn’t going to work if she can just hit her speed dial and talk to you. When she does start hearing reports about you, they have to emphasize that you’ve changed, and for the better. She’s got to believe that you really have a new life, and that it somehow relates to your putting her behind you.
Some time has elapsed now, and it’s time to set the next stage of the plan into motion. It’s time to emerge from the cocoon and let people see the butterfly you’ve become, but you’ve got to manage the operation carefully to get the best outcome. You’re going to have a quiet get-together at your place. Not a big party, just a small gathering of a few carefully chosen friends who will be favorably impressed with the new you. Make sure beforehand to spend some time on a tanning bed, and get a manicure – men’s fingernails are often atrocious – and take care of all the little particulars that add up to a big impression. You’re a new person now and you’ve gone through some pretty drastic changes. It’s time to make sure that you show everyone that you won’t still be throwing the same lame parties too. Get some interesting foods for your guests to munch on and get plenty of drinks for them too (nothing is worse than running out of beer or whatever). Play some smooth and chill music too – no heavy metal. Parties are no fun if you can’t actually have a decent conversation with your friends. Plus, everyone will be surprised at your new style. And the most important part is to make sure you invite one of your girlfriend’s close friends to the party. She’ll notice your changes and tell your girlfriend all about it.
Okay, the trap is set and baited, but you still need to entice your prey to step in. Get out a bit more, go to places you know her friends might see you. Share some of your new activities with them, but don’t be ostentatious or overly gregarious. Let them guess that you’re not alone – “We had a great time skiing last month,” for instance, but make it sound as if whatever relationship you might be in, it’s not really important. This will continue for a while – women can be skittish sometimes, and she might not yet really believe that you’re doing better after she left than before. Don’t be concerned – there’ll come a point where she’ll explode!
The time will arrive, finally, that you actually bump into each other. Kiss her on the cheek and keep your talk light, general things, nothing deep or personal. Be a gentleman – not aloof, but not too close. Tell her you’d like to visit over a cup of coffee sometime: ask if she has the same phone number and let her know you’ll be in touch. How you break off this encounter is crucial – how you do it will have a great deal to do with your overall success. Say goodbye (the peck on the cheek is optional), then turn and walk along, continuing about whatever you were doing before you bumped into her. DON’T LOOK BACK! Remember – she isn’t there!
Let a week or two go by before you call her, and ask her to a respectable place for coffee, or maybe lunch. It should be a popular place, but not one you’ve taken her to before. Make sure you don’t get a secluded table – it should be out in the open in a relatively crowded area. The only thing you shouldn’t talk about is your feelings (and hers), and your past together. You’re still hunting, remember, and she’s still your quarry – you have to get her completely at ease and relaxed. This meeting isn’t the time to pounce, it’s still for enticing her with the enigma. Remember, you’re a total gentleman – when the meal’s over, escort her out, give her a friendly peck on the cheek, and promise to call her again.
She’s going wild now with the curiosity that has been growing – especially considering that she met with you and tried to get the information directly and couldn’t! When you finally call in a week or two, she’ll be ready for whatever you propose! You’re at an ideal point now – she’s ready to get back together, even if she doesn’t openly admit it. Take your time now – enjoy the time together, and enjoy the lack of pressure She’s so consumed by curiosity that when you call again, she’ll be open to pretty much whatever you suggest. Don’t overdo it! Be patient – suggest maybe another lunch, or perhaps a daytime social activity like a museum visit. Although it might not seem like it, your chase is pretty much over and you’ve won. For the sake of the relationship, take it slow and easy – you’ll both appreciate that you did. And above all, have fun!
If you found this article helpful and would like to learn more ways you get get your girlfriend back, check out Getting Back Your Ex-Girlfriend, Win Her Back Guide, and Getting Back My Girlfriend.
The Old Curiosity Shop (2007) Part 1 of 14
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